...True Story - Ur Killing Me...

The End

2009-12-04T06:26:00.002+02:00

Dear Friends,

Blog is done with.

I'm over it.

Cheers.

Africa - a continent of equality and acceptance

2009-11-29T23:59:00.000+02:00

Whilst on my daily travels from hotel room to bar - and on occasion to the "chicken-head soup" restaurant I have noticed many special qualities Nigeria has to offer.

Sure I may have begun my stay here thinking very little of the people, of the country, of the food, of the infrastructure etc but now, well - I think much less of them all.

Gasp and horror I hear, but I have a slight bit of substantiary evidence at my disposal and today I am going to share with you they manner in which Nigerian culture treats the world with the utmost respect.

Equal Rights for women

Fair treatment of the disabled

Enjoy the week everybody.

Miley Friday

2009-11-27T12:55:00.001+02:00

Im sorry Miley is late guys - Nigeria is killing me, along with Jacques bosses.

So without further ado...

Nigeria - Uber fun!

2009-11-25T11:46:00.000+02:00

Just a quick update to let ya'll know we're keeping strong over here...in the arse end of the world.

Town

Hotel

SMC Model

Courage/Inspiration

Nigeria

2009-11-24T12:02:00.001+02:00

Well, after much delay I and SMC model are here in Enugu in Nigeria. When we asked our escort why there were so many police roadblocks, he simply replied "Kidnapping has increased a lot lately". Not cool!

To better describe the essence of this place to you all a have prepared a bit of show and tell.

Basically, it's like this...

PLUS

True story.

Happy Birthday Miley!

2009-11-23T10:34:00.001+02:00

Yes, the truest story of them all is upon us today.

Miley turns 17 today - born this day back in 1992 did her folks know the greatness they were about to bestow upon the world?

Whether they knew it or not - we applaud and thank them.

Happy Happy Miley!

It's Magic

2009-11-20T08:11:00.001+02:00

From the girl with the hair - Selena Gomez - for Jacques.

How can you not like that? It's impossible.

Happy Friday!

2009-11-20T07:15:00.000+02:00

So here we are again - amazing how quickly Friday has yet again snuck up upon us.

Before we begin I should say that I'm not quite in Nigeria, but work has begun and I'll be there on Monday it seems. My last weekend of civilization for a while is upon me. Tragic times these.

Anyway Miley Friday, awesome as ever and as an added bonus it's Miley's birthday on Monday so expect more on that...

You're welcome.

National Anthem Debacle

2009-11-19T11:40:00.001+02:00

Basically, all I have to say about Ras' performance is...

Now that's a true story.

The awesomeness of Google Street View

2009-11-17T12:03:00.002+02:00

So it's been out for quite some time now, Google Street View that is. You may even have seen the little Toyota Prius cars running about in Johannesburg, Cape Town, Durban etc.

But have you taken the time to log onto Google Earth and see what it's all about? Quite frankly I think it's the best thing since...well Miley. And with a credit note like that you know it's got to be filled with loads of awesomeness.

So, for those of you who have had a look, good on ya! For those of you who have not done so as of yet and perhaps need some convincing...

It's like being there, just not.

The stuff for South Africa isn't on Google Earth quite yet but be patient, soon it will be and you can check out your house or Pick 'n Pay or some other stuff. (not quite the same value as the picks above but cool none-the-less).

P.S. I'm off to Nigeria tonight so.. it's been nice knowing ya'll.

More Crazy Book Titles

2009-11-16T09:08:00.002+02:00

Following the monumental success of "Crazy Book Titles", well here are some more!

Enjoy

Isn't that wonderful?

Original link here

Miley Friday

2009-11-13T08:20:00.001+02:00

Boys and girls,

In keeping with my mantra of no one lady being placed on a pedestal above any other, no girl being more desirable than the next and no woman being valued above any other on this blog I give you...Miley Friday.

I think that I ought to tell you all that this is possibly the last of Miley Friday for a bit, not due to a lack of love, passion or equality on my women grading scale but, the True Story is that your fearless Captain, along with "That Guy Debbie Wants To Feed" is off to Nigeria.

Yes shock and horror I know, but don't despair - I'll take good care of "That Guy..."

But I will still do my best to deliver what you need!

I bid you all farewell, for the time being, and if I don't see you again - well you win some and you lose some, don't ya?

Practical and fashionable...

2009-11-12T14:07:00.001+02:00

With the weekend drawing ever closer I thought it was time I distributed some much needed assistance.

You see, the thing is that it's often the case that when you're out at a friends place, restaurant or what have you and you order a beer (or one of those fruity things the girls like) and BAM! no bottle opener.

True story - and a sad one at that.

Fact is you can't very well carry around a bottle open everywhere you go - without looking like a chop that is....Or can you?

Yes sir, now you can. Have a look at these, then go out into the world and get yourself one, or two...

Buy It

Such useful advice I dispense.

Letters to the editor

2009-11-11T11:18:00.000+02:00

I received this from Douglas earlier today:

So, not wanting to be rude to a loyal follower...

Dear Douglas,

As you are well aware, I am always willing to take requests and suggestions for this, our most famed blog. I must also applaud you on your courteous and friendly manner of email correspondence - it is seldom the case I come by such a message in these trying times in which we currently live.

However, before I move along to the result of your request I must comment on your statement "I would risk saying that she (Bar Refaeli) is way better than Taylor Swift".
Now Douglas, we should be careful when making such rash accusations - it is not within the nature of this blog to place one lady/women/girl above any other - to me they are all equal. I would never place just one group/individual etc on a pedestal. So if you would please keep that in mind for future reference - although I must commend you on your passion.

Nevertheless, I find your request to be valid and of an honest nature and so I shall reward you and everyone else with some images of Bar Refaeli.

And a video for good measure...

Well done and thank you Douglas.

And to the rest of you...you're welcome.

Urban Camouflage

2009-11-10T06:56:00.000+02:00

Did you all see Miley's magnificent victory in the poll? - never doubted it.

Moving on though, here are some pretty cool pictures of "urban camouflage". I am not entirely certain of the need or reason for such things and it would seem that some people have far too much time on their hands - but it's impressive none-the-less.

Original link, here.

I love milk

2009-11-07T21:40:00.000+02:00

Do they serve milk in prison?

Miley Friday

2009-11-06T07:19:00.001+02:00

With what seems a glorious victory looming for Miley in the poll today - not that I didn't expect it - I present to you this week's Miley Friday.

There is quite a mix this week from Miley's Halloween pictures to concert screen captions, a Sugar magazine cover and a return of Miley and friends (including Demi Lovato and that girl with the hair).

So without further ado...

So there you have it - I hope you'll all enjoy this as much as I did.

Happy Friday!

And you're welcome!

P.S. See how I snuck that in there little communist man?

Crazy book titles

2009-11-05T08:13:00.001+02:00

I can't say I read all that much - I'm a bit of a, "judge the book by its cover" kind of guy.

However, sometimes a book comes along that sparks my interest - like these...

How awesome is that?

A few more of 'em here

The death of a legend

2009-11-04T12:44:00.000+02:00

I don't suppose there is a person alive in SA who hasn't at some stage or another been in a Citi Golf.

Fact is those days are over, I received this today...

Love 'em or hate 'em - I think it's sad to see them go

Monumental FAIL!

2009-11-04T11:20:00.002+02:00

True Story.

"A passenger in an air force display team shot himself 100 metres into the sky when he accidentally activated the ejector seat."

What's worse however....this happened here in SA!

"South African Air Force bosses scrambled a helicopter to pick up the passenger after the blunder near Langebaanweg airfield, 80 miles north of Cape Town.

The incident happened shortly after he took off for a joyride in the Pilatus PC-7 Mk II plane with an experienced pilot from South Africa's Silver Falcons air display team."

I suppose we must understand though that the chap is, more than likely, from the Cape - and in the Cape, that's how they roll.

Still - FAIL!

See the original story here...Ananova

What is the world coming to?

2009-11-03T12:25:00.001+02:00

True Story.

Walmart - this biggest retailer in the whole world offers coffins for sale now! What's worse is that they are selling them at prices far below that of most funeral homes - basically ending a lot of their business (ok not sure if that's worse but anyway).

Anyway, that's like going to Pick 'n Pay, walking down the aisles, "...clothing...pet food...garden stuff...COFFINS". Who the hell goes to Pick 'n Pay to buy thier coffins?

They have a range of 14 to choose from as well as dozens of urns!

Apparently people are buying these things though - madness I tell you!

Anyway, here's the whole stroy from Sky News.

True to my word...

2009-11-02T10:27:00.000+02:00

...if the people request it, I will add it. (If I remember)

So the poll is up - the truth about Miley will be known - well confirmed.

Vote with your heart.

Epic Ferrari Theme Park

2009-11-02T10:04:00.000+02:00

Yip, True Story.

Ferrari is in the process of building a 100 000 square metre indoor theme park in Abu Dhabi.

It's packed with all the awesomeness we've come to expect from Ferrari (bar this year's F1 season) and its main attraction will be the fastest rollercoaster in the world which will reach speeds of 200km/h!

It's so big they reckon it can be seen from space when all is said and done.

There will also be training centres, simulators, restaurants and tonnes of other stuff.

Awesomeness personified

Original Story here.

Miley Monday

2009-11-02T06:57:00.000+02:00

I must apologise for missing the most important day of the week on Friday.

It wasn't easy for me to not issue Miley Friday as I should have, but unfortunately there were more pressing matters to see to - I'm sure you'll understand that more pressing than Miley is super-duper importnant and needed to be done at the time!

So, without further ado, here she is....and to the "Ginge" - I'd take her over any of those from Saturday night.

Makes u wonder, doesn't it?

And...

You're welcome.

Defend Miley's Honour - Again

2009-10-29T14:15:00.000+02:00

Yes this "True Story" breaks on the eve of "Miley Friday". It seems, as my niece would say, "jealousy makes you nasty" is proved true again.

Miley Cyrus has been voted as the "worst celebrity influence of 2009" by JSYK.com. What's worse is that the sight is aimed at (and thus the voters are) teenagers. Kids suck! Honestly, she was voted worse than Britney Spears and Kanye West - they're "killing me".

The whole sad story is here News24.

An extract...

Los Angeles - Miley Cyrus, one of Disney's hottest stars of the past three years with hit records and hit films, has been voted the worst celebrity influence of 2009 by the very people who made her a star, tweens and teens, according to an online poll on Wednesday.

 Cyrus, 16, took 42% of votes in the poll for AOL's JSYK.com (Just So You Know) website aimed at 9-15 year-olds, pushing Britney Spears and rapper Kanye West into second and third places, respectively, in a section on worst celebrity influences of the year.

This makes me sad, it really does.

But, it gets even worse for Miley, for you see her stalker is off the hook!

Savannah - A Georgia grand jury has refused to indict a 53-year-old on charges of attempting to stalk teen star Miley Cyrus as she filmed a movie.

The grand jury decided on Wednesday that prosecutors failed to present sufficient evidence to indict Mark McLeod of Appling, Georgia, on charges of attempted stalking, obstruction of a police officer and disturbing the peace.

McLeod has been jailed since August 4 after police arrested him twice on Tybee Island, where 16-year-old Cyrus was filming The Last Song.

Police say McLeod told them he was engaged to marry the Hannah Montana star and resisted being escorted from the set.

A spokesperson for Chatham County District Attorney Larry Chisolm said he had no immediate comment, but was working on a statement. McLeod remained in jail on Wednesday.

You must be joking! Source News24.

So in an effort to restore some form of dignity for our beloved Miley I give you...

What the hell eats a great white shark!

2009-10-28T09:16:00.000+02:00

True Story

A 10 foot (3+ metre) great white shark has been bitten, nearly in half, by what experts estimate must be a 20 foot (6+ metre) shark!

It all went down just east of Brisbane Australia and basically the Aussies are now kakking themselves because a shark that big is lurking the coastline of the surfing "Mecca".

This is the result...

How crazy is that?

Anyway, original story here at Sky News.

3D Art for Your Garage!

2009-10-27T10:53:00.000+02:00

Is your garage a filthy pit of horror and despair? Or maybe it's just too simple and plain looking for your tastes?

Problem solved.

Style-Your-Garage.com has you sorted. They make some brilliant tarpaulins you just put over your garage door to give it an awesome new look. Even better, it's in 3D so they look super-duper real, as if you've got something special in your garage.

How cool is that?

Check out the website for more Style-Your-Garage.com or have a look on Sky News.

Only in Africa

2009-10-26T07:25:00.000+02:00

Africa - the land of many "true stories" and things that kill us (literally).

Credit to "The Ginge" for the pics.

Typical.

I Love Miley...Friday

2009-10-23T10:19:00.001+02:00

True story.

Today is a great day. I feel that the Miley Friday you are about to see is some of her/my best work to date.

I have chosen for you two photoshoots done by a chap called Michael Lavine. Miley looks possibly too good in these. You should recognise the one but the other is fresh!

I expect to receive comments such as: Captain, this is too awesome, the awesomeness is overwhelming.

Deal with it. You deserve this. And do yourselves a favour and click on the images and see them in their full glorious size.

I know, almost too wonderfully brilliant and fantastic for words - but that's how Miley rolls.

Today, more than most days - you're welcome! Happy Friday.

Defend Miley's Honour!

2009-10-22T08:53:00.000+02:00

Recently a tragic event occurred. Dear Miley and Kim Cattrall pitched up at some shindig wearing the same outfit - tragic I know. But, what's worse is that people seem to think it has come down do a vote on who looks better in said outfit.

Now I will admit that I might have an ever so slightly biased opinion on the matter but I put that aside when casting my most objective vote on the matter. The vote I'm talking about, or poll, was posted on the Women24 website. It's great to note the title they have given the post "Mutton and Lamb" - love it! I implore you to visit them here, Women24, and make the right choice - Miley Cyrus.

I don't want you to vote purely because I say so, but rather because it's the right thing to do!

In case you're wondering, this is the supposed "competition".

See how Miley looks at Kim Cattrall, all the time Miley knowing that she's "killing it". I think she must be laughing hysterically inside.

But it just goes to prove how HUGE Miley is in the celeb world. Even the has-beens are trying to be like her.

Remember to vote! Women24

Miley - well done love

BBC Landscape Photograph of the Year

2009-10-20T08:06:00.001+02:00

The BBC "Landscape Photograph of the Year" competetion for 2009 wrapped up recently and there are some pretty awesome pics, two of which are here:

Not too shabby are they?

See the rest of 'em here.

SA Sports Illustrated Swimwear Edition 2009

2009-10-19T11:38:00.002+02:00

Ja, True Story, it's out today and hopefully the website will be up soon too.

SA Sports Illustrated Swimwear Edition cover for 2009 looks something like this...

That's Catrinel Menghia right there, not too bad I suppose.

Some of the models for this years are: Dominique Piek, Genevieve Debra Morton, Candice Boucher, Catrinel Menghia, Lera Koryts'ka, Lyndall Melissa Jarvis, Marzaan Kallis, Shane' van der Westhuizen, Shashi Naidoo, Tanya Moira Mangany and Elbe van der Merwe.

Anyway, check out some of the pics here until the new site is up and running.

Also, the TV show part of it all will be on MNet on the 24th October at 09:30PM - don't miss it, in fact PVR that thing.

As always - ur welcome.

Miley Friday

2009-10-16T07:32:00.000+02:00

It's that time again - Miley Friday - what joy!

Do yourselves a favour and watch Hannah Montana today at 16:00, 18:35 or 20:40 on the Disney channel. Or tomorrow or Sunday or ... you catch my drift.

You are most welcome and HAPPY FRIDAY!

"Ho White" beer advertisment

2009-10-15T15:07:00.000+02:00

Yip, it's true. "Snow White" has changed her tune and in keeping up with the times, "Ho White" is born!

A beer company has launched (and now seemingly ceased) an ad campaign using "Ho White" as thier mascot/model - call her what you like.

I thought it was pretty funny, but Disney (the birthplace my my beloved Miley) does not agree - basically they're kakking themselves over the whole issue.

This is what it looks like...

Ho White in action.

Some versions of the original story Sky News and AdelaideNow.

Payment of me debt...

2009-10-15T09:02:00.000+02:00

Yes it's a True Story - I have a debt to pay.

But no ordinary kind of debt, no sir. You see, as I returned to my desk after having performed some slave labour yesterday I was greeted by a most glorious site. A life sized Miley poster was hanging above my blogging station.

I must admit, I was speechless but very touched by the thought and consideration of it all.

Thus, I see it only fitting that I repay those little Miley poster fairies for their kind addition to my life.

So, upon request from "SMC Model" and "that guy Debbie wants to feed", I give to you Taylor Swift and Shakira...

That was for SMC Model, and now for "that guy who Debbie wants to feed"

Thanks again guys!

When times are tight...

2009-10-14T07:07:00.001+02:00

With the current economic situation as it is, it becomes imperative that when something breaks you don't buy a new one - no sir, you fix it up good as new.

So today, I present to you the results of the hard fixer-upper work I'm talking about.

Look at the awesomeness of some of these repair jobs...

Compliments of, There I Fixed It

And you're welcome.

Is Ellen DeGeneres the smartest woman ever?

2009-10-13T08:28:00.001+02:00

True story goes as such...

Ellen DeGeneres has a talk show she hosts every day. If you're lucky you can catch it on Mnet Series at 00:00, 06:00, 12:00 and the new show at 18:00 each weekday. The basics are simple, get a few guests on the show, play some games and hand out money and prizes to the audience - Yay, everbody loves Ellen!

Now, this is where the brilliance of it all is explained...

Ellen DeGeneres not only hosts a killer show but, she is also a lesbian. Now, what has that got to do with anything you ask? Well it's simple really.

Being a lesbian, Ellen has a girlfirend/life partner/wife - Portia de Rossi.

Now that's not bad is it?

Next, who goes and watches talk shows? Women!

Who does Ellen love? Women!

Who gets invited as guests on the show? Well, I'll show you...

And

I swear Ellen was looking down her dress the whole time!

So you see everyday Ellen DeGeneres goes home to Portia de Rossi and Portia asks, "How was work love?". To which Ellen replies, "You know, same as every other day, bla bla bla ..."

But Ellen, we know what you're really thinking and kudos to you. Awesome plan, awesome strategy and quite honestly I can easily say...

Ellen, you're killing it!

New world atlas

2009-10-12T07:15:00.009+02:00

With the world changing at the incredibly rapid rate it is it seems only fitting the paper/digital representations of it i.e. maps and such keep up with the changes.

Seems someone has. WorldMapper has produced an atlas that shows the world from a new perspective including: population, income, violence, transport etc. The atlas is skewed to accomodate these categories in a fancy ass way.

Some examples of their newest edition (population)

As for violent deaths, we're not doing too well here in SA.

Interesting stuff none the less, don't you think?
Check the rest out here, WorldMapper

It's Friday, She's Miley

2009-10-09T06:36:00.003+02:00

What can I say - still loving the Miley.

Happy Friday

Fantastic French Game Show

2009-10-07T13:30:00.000+02:00

True Story...for the guys, they don't make this stuff for girls.

Best game show ever!

You're super duper welcome!

Distressing news

2009-10-06T10:47:00.000+02:00

It has very recently come to my attention that certain people are still not watching Chuck on Tuesday evenings at 19:30 on Mnet.

I have thought very long and hard on as to why someone would not want to watch Chuck and other than being damn rude - I can think of no logical reason.

Therefore, I take it upon myself to display to everyone yet again why we should watch Chuck tonight on Mnet at 19:30.

And this...

Really people, I am doing you a favour - guy or girl.

Got no friends?

2009-10-06T06:51:00.000+02:00

So, nobody follows you on Twitter?

Your Facebook friends look something like this...

Well, now there's a solution! Buy your friends!

True story - an Aussie company (uSocial) is selling Facebook friends, Twitter followers etc. Be lonely no more. You can buy 1000 friends for as little as $177!

It goes down something like this on their site...

If you're lonely, check it out.

P.S. This kills me.

DIY Guy's Car Predicament

2009-10-05T13:50:00.000+02:00

I'm sure you would have seen the results of last week's fiercely contested poll.

For those of you who did not, it was a narrow victory for the Subaru Forester over the Mitsubishi Outlander. Now, as it was DIY Guy who requested the poll, it is only fitting the victory of the Forester be celebrated in the way he desired.

And, as a result....

DIY Guy - you're welcome!

Africa - always good for a laugh

2009-10-04T19:46:00.000+02:00

Dude in front - killing it with the dance moves. Guy behind - killing it with a cactus.

Oh, to be a dog!

2009-10-04T09:55:00.000+02:00

There are many reasons why one would choose the life of a dog above their own. No doubt sleeping all day, barking once in a while, getting every meal made for you and such ain't a bad way to live - but it can always be improved upon.

How you may ask? Well simply put, if one of these people were your owner, you'd be doing alright! And yet again, in an effort to include boys and girls in this, our most glorious blog, there's something for everyone...

Personally, I would like be Rachel Bilson's b!tch - just saying.

But on a sad note, Jessica Simpson's dog was snatched and got ate by a coyote a little while back.

True Story - but very sad.

If you're keen to keep up 2 date on their doggy lives visit, Celeb Dog Blog

Rash accusations and apologies

2009-10-01T11:56:00.000+02:00

So it would seem that some of our viewers/readers and such are displeased with the seemingly one sided, male oriented view point and content of this, our most cherished blog.

So I took a look at the blog from an objective view point and decided that it's brilliant as it is.

However, I'm always willing to accommodate the ladies and I aim to please. So in an effort to change my flawed ways - but not to diverge too drastically from the overall tone and feeling of the blog.

So without further ado, and not much time to prepare either, I'm sure you've seen it before, but here it is again:

Dolce and Gabbana - something for the boys and something for the girls!

I hope this pleases?

Teazers and Caster Semenya

2009-10-01T07:46:00.001+02:00

I'm sure you've all heard that the ASA (Advertising Standards Authority - aka that mense who make TV/life boring) is not thrilled about a Teazers billboard on Rivonia Rd. Apparently it is degrading or discriminatory or something towards ol' Caster.

True to form, Lolly says it has absolutely nothing to do with Caster and only shows that those who are employed by Teazers are "100% woman". It just so happens that Lolly has now offered Caster 20K so that she may "hold her head up benefit from her achievements".

Anyway, the TRUE STORY behind this is that I don't really give damn, I was only looking for an excuse to put up this delightful picture!

Enjoy

Original story here, News24

P.S. Pay Teazers a visit, those ladies have families to support.

As always, you're welcome!

Morale boost!

2009-09-30T11:35:00.000+02:00

Gents, and some ladies.

I fear that the office morale is at an all time low. As such, I have conjured up a most cunning plan to boost spirits!

Here you are, hope everyone feels much better!

Victoria's Secret...

And a video for good measure...

I Hope ya'll are much happier!

ICC Champions Trophy

2009-09-30T07:07:00.000+02:00

Did anyone watch the game yesterday between New Zealand and England?

If you didn't it went down something like this...

I think it should also be stated that the same fellow who would not allow our captain a runner the other day scored a glorious 0. That's right Andrew Strauss got nothing, zip, zero. In fact I'm considering him for the FAIL of the week award.

And that's a true story.

As seen on Bing!

2009-09-30T06:38:00.000+02:00

Following yesterday's proud Google moment there was a comment made by none other than our very own SMC Model that you've not "arrived", so to speak, until you're listed on Bing - apparently Google isn't good enough.

So without further ado, here you are, proof of true success (apparently).

So there you are.

Miley does it again!

2009-09-29T14:33:00.000+02:00

I know it's not Friday - but I'm sure you'll forgive me.

This is the latest video from dear Miley Cyrus and I dare say she's "killing it" in this video!

Enjoy...

Still loving the Miley

A Proud Google Moment

2009-09-29T08:08:00.000+02:00

Now I know that these days you can "Google" just about anything and you'll find it.

But when the day comes that you "Google" something magical and self-created and that pops up as the top result, well that's special, isn't it?

So here we now stand - with "True Story - Ur Killing Me" just one week and one day old, sitting proudly on your Google search results page.

The pride is overwhelming.

Have a good day my friends!

Hitler's skull it aint!

2009-09-28T14:16:00.000+02:00

True story - perhaps?

An Amercian scientist who conducted DNA tests on what was thought to be the skull of the filthy Nazi leader Adolf Hitler says that the skull is actually that of a woman!

Turns out there are quite a few historians and such who say they don't believe Hitler died in that bunker in the depths of Berlin back in '45 as the soviets marched their way through the city.

Thought to be Hitler's skull with bullet hole.

How crazy would that be?

Original story here, Sky News

I want this guy's job

2009-09-28T13:02:00.000+02:00

I came across this delightful story recently...

True story is as follows.

Katy Perry, as seen below, was filming for some video and her "assets" became mis-aligned. But rather than correct things herself it seemed far more fitting that she get some guy to do it for her. In this case it's the make-up guy.

So just a thought for any of you if you're seeking a career change.

The evidence plus some extra...

From the look on her face I don't think she minds at all.

And you're welcome.

Taylor Swift Moment

2009-09-28T08:03:00.000+02:00

This morning's addition comes as a request from our very own "SMC Model".

Personally, I think she's too tall but anyway.

I did my best, hope you enjoy...

Not too bad I guess.

Jessica Biel going up the mountain

2009-09-25T12:14:00.000+02:00

Who doesn't like Jessica Biel? I can't think of a valid reason not to like her and now it gets even better.

True stroy...

She's going to climb Mt Kilimanjaro early next year in order to raise awareness about the need for clean water. How nice of her. Not sure though how many people don't know they need clean water, but anyway, why argue? Let us rather appreciate her efforts as well as her other, um... "qualities".

Ja, I know.

Original story here, News24

Well it's Friday, isn't it?

2009-09-25T08:33:00.000+02:00

No need for stories, just enjoy...

Happy Friday and you're welcome.

Gotta watch it!

2009-09-23T16:21:00.000+02:00

So for those of you who took my advice and watched the recommended shows last night you were treated to some wonderful sights and even a guest appearance by Jenny McCarthy!

I know, how lucky were you!

Anyway, I thought I'd do you all a solid and let you in on some even better advice.

Tonight, 8:30pm on Vuzu it's Gossip Girl. If I'm honest, it doesn't really matter what it's about, all you need to know is this:

And this

And my favourite

Who also features in this

Her name is Leighton Meester - remember this because one day you'll bear witness to the "home video" she made recently and you'll be like, "no way, Captain told me that would happen".

Or something.

You're welcome.

Equal rights for women

2009-09-23T06:48:00.000+02:00

True story.

The women of the Swedish army are very upset because of the sub-standard brassieres they have to "work" with.

The fact is that they unclip too easily. Granted, there's a time and a place for such a bra, but not when you're getting you're ass shot off. (Not sure where or when exactly the Swedish army does anything though, but anyway).

So I thought to myself - is it even worth investigating this issue any further, they're army chicks right? Can they really be worthy of the glory of this blog and worthy of us paying attention to their complaints?

Well have a look at some pics of some of the women of the Swedish army...

And her too...

I know, they're killing it.

So in conclusion, HELL YEAH, give them whatever they want!

Some more pics here, Swedish Army Women

And original story here, News24

As always, you're welcome!

Tuesday Television

2009-09-22T06:41:00.000+02:00

So it's Tuesday night, you're home and nothing to do so you decide to switch on the tele and have a gander on what their is for you to watch, flipping through the channels at random, never quite settling on anything decent.

Worry no more - I've got you sorted. Follow my lead and have a look at these 2 shows.

1. Chuck - basically, the story is that this guy has all the US government secrets in his head and the government needs his help to save the world. Awesome, I know.

But why should you watch it you may wonder?

True story lads. - Mnet at 7:30.

2. Privileged -certainly lesser known than Chuck but worth the watch none the less. The story centres around 2 little rich girls who need a bit of help at school so their grandma gets them a tutor...etc etc.

Your reason for watching?

This...

This...

And this...

Vuzu, channel 123 at 8:30.

I know, you're welcome.

Pass the pineapple

2009-09-21T06:39:00.000+02:00

The "pineapple" as it's affectionately known at an educational institute here in Johannesburg, is a manner in which those who have failed can have their shame posted for all to see.

Can I use the pineapple Ginger and Mr. Diana?

So, with permission from said institution the first pineapple shall be passed - or rather accepted by us here in Fourways...

I thought it was high time someone made public the degree of failure we here at work endure everyday.

And so, in the spirit of failure, let the world know that you're not invited - but if you're coming up anyway, well we don't want you to fall.

This kills me.

Anyway, it's Monday and a 4 day week, don't let it get you down DIY Guy (aka Steve).

Looking for a new home?

2009-09-21T06:27:00.000+02:00

I heard, through the grapevine, that Jacques was looking to buy himself a pad. A bit of a place to which he shall lure the ladies (so to speak).

True story.

Anyway, being the nice guy I am, I've got you sorted Jacques. I've found you a place. 4 Bed, fancy ass kitchen,nice garden, restaurant - you know, the normal stuff.

And it's a bargain at R100 000 000!

Have a look, Pam Golding Website

It starts...

2009-09-20T20:57:00.000+02:00

An EPIC true story is about to unfold!

Following the monumental success of the famed "Miley Friday" I quickly became accutely aware of how necessary it was for me to develop my weekly efforts into something far more than that of its humble beginnings.

You see, it has always been the case that what I produced week after week - the comedy, the literaure, the visually pleasing displays - was never really done for my sake. Oh no, the route cause was something far greater! Yes gents, I did it for you. Your somber faces staring at me week in and week out pleaded to me to bring some form of escapism to your lives.

And so, from where we began, with so many of you afraid and unwilling to take pleasure in the weekly tribute, to where we are now - crying out for more and sending unpleasent emails when I'm late in delivering - "True Story - Ur Killing Me" - is born.

Expect more of the same and so much more. Mullets are only the beginning.

Brilliant, I know!